Being caught in my last semester of college has been a constant struggle to grasp that there’s more to life than Las Cruces. As each semester has passed I’ve faced new challenges and it seems like my next challenge will be my toughest yet. I’m freaking out. This whole coming of age thing is completely overwhelming and right now, in this moment, I don’t feel like I’m ready.
I’ve lived my life in the comfort of being familiar. I’ve been surrounded with people who have had my best interest at heart. I’ve been surrounded by the same friends for years, friends who have put up with all my ups and downs, friends who I’ve shared some of the most intimate moments with. But what happens when I leave?
I’ve worked so hard over the past four years to establish myself and find myself and now that it’s time to spread my wings and make it on my own, I’m scared shitless. It just doesn’t seem real. I’ve been talking about leaving Las Cruces since I moved here in third grade. I’ve never been satisfied with the idea of staying in the Mesilla Valley, hell I’ve never been satisfied with staying in New Mexico. Leaving this desert town has always been a dream but I know once I walk across that stage in December it’s going to be so much more than just a dream. I may be making my start in Albuquerque but I know I won’t be there for long and I know once my time in Albuquerque is finished so is my life in New Mexico. It’s just a good, crazy, overwhelming, insanely scary feeling when your dreams become reality and growing up is no longer just something you talk about doing but something that is staring you right in the face screaming “it’s time.”
- musicloveandsun posted this